Missing you today [Night #2]
Some days I wake up with your memory on my eyelashes. Just opening my eyes and my longing scatters in every corner of my room like fairy dust. I can’t tell stories when I miss you like this, I can only talk about the pain I feel. I can’t remember the way you loved me, the way I loved you, I just long. I bump virulently against the finality of death. My stubborn love for you battles with our fate, the destiny, unable to change a thing.
Today, I just miss you, my daughter. There are no substitutions for your love, no replacements for your body, no consolations today. It can’t be any other way, I understand. I accept it. I will walk and work with this longing in tow. I will carry this pain into every room I enter, in every place I sit, I will pass it into the ground with my feet. And if someone holds my hand today, they will feel it, too. Your absence so intertwined with my presence.